Hand Coding

Some friends of mine think of me as a loony beer purist. And, I’m ok with that ;). Labels aside, I figure that if I’m going to invest the calories in a beverage, it may as well taste good (after all, there isn’t yet Splenda Beer — nor do I hope that one ever exists). Fortunately, if you’re looking into broadening your beer palette, there're many drinkable beers available these days.

One of the sites that I often visit for beer ratings & reviews is RateBeer.com. While the site may seem overwhelming at first, the most pertinent section for most people is probably the beer ratings part of the site. If you’re ready to dive in, you could select a Beer Style or Country (from along the left side of the page) to see the best beers in that style or from that country, respectively. Or, for a healthy dose of schadenfreude, their list of the worst beers is usually good for a laugh. (Apparently, Bud Light scored even lower than Beast Light. Who knew? )

In any case, for a quick list of beers that taste good which you actually have a chance of finding in your local store, I’d recommend RateBeer’s list of Top Widely Distributed Beers (which also sometimes refer to as their list of “Top Accessible” beers). As I understand it, a given beer needs several hundred ratings to make it onto the list — that conveniently excludes, say, beers from Tom’s Nanobrewery in Somecity USA which you wouldn’t have a chance of finding locally.

Having said that, there’s no inherent downside to a beer just because it’s widely available. For instance, my favorite porter, Fullers London Porter, is there at #14 and it’s “only” among the 99th percentile of beers reviewed on the site ;). Porters are good — you could think of them as a notch down from a stout, if you haven’t tried one — but they’re less than ideal for patio-sipping. They’re generally hearty enough that they need a food accompaniment to balance out their oomph.

Probably my favorite style of beer, though, are abbey tripels. The style is classically Belgian, but that’s not to say that only Belgians make a good tripel. And, sure enough, some respectable tripels make the list as well. Chimay Blanche (White) pulls in at #33 and La Fin Du Monde is shortly after that at #37. And, while stouts aren’t personally my cup of tea, they make a strong showing on the list as well (just after a duo of two abt/quadrupel beers in 1st & 2nd place, stouts take on 3rd, 4th and 5th place).

If all these beer styles are greek to you, don’t worry — just try printing out their list of Top Widely Distributed Beers the next time you need beer and you’re headed to the store. Then just glance over what’s on the shelf and see if some of them are on the list. To be sure, even the “lowest rated” beer among their Widely-Distributed list, Sierra Nevada Porter is in the 90th percentile among beers — not too shabby. Any of the beers on the list would make for a formidable alternative to garden-variety American-macrobrews (which is to say, Budweiser, Coors and Miller).

I went to buy some beer Friday evening and, after selecting a brew, I took it to the register to pay. The clerk was a man in his 40s with a double chin:

Clerk: How old are you?

Me: 27.

Clerk: Oh, ok… That’ll be $7.13.

I then proceeded to pay for the beer. But, it left me wondering whether this was the clerk’s attempt at age verification or whether he was just curious how old I was ;).

I’m back in Pittsburgh to visit my parents for Thanksgiving. And, as my dad isn’t a beer drinker (he prefers wine), we didn’t have much beer in the house when my brother and I arrived. So, it was time for a beer run :). And, in case you're not aware of Pennsylvania’s silly beer laws, beer can only be sold by the case here — the logic is that people would drink less that way (or something).

So, my brother and I headed off to a beer store (yeah, a beer-only store, since beer can’t be sold in supermarkets here). As we perused the aisles, we came across St. Nikolaus Bock from Pennsylvania Brewing. There were a couple other tempting beers, such as Sam Adams Octoberfest, but we decided to go for a case of the St. Nikolaus Bock as we’d probably have a hard time finding Penn Brewing beers elsewhere.

After chilling a few bottles in the fridge, Adrian and I popped open a few later that evening. I took a few sips and realized that this was undeniably a bock — there was plenty of malt flavor without much of a hops presence. And, it reminded me a bit of Paulaner Salvator (a dopplebock) as both had overtones of caramel and raisins.

Both of them are good beers but they’re not really sipping-beers. As sweet as they are, they’re almost unpleasant when drank on their own; but they can be rather enjoyable with the right food to accompany them. And, just to assuage my curiosity, I decided to check on which foods would be suitable for a bock. BeerTown has a section on food/beer pairings where they suggested barbecued salmon with a dry bock (that and limburger cheese, but I’m not sure when I’ll next run across some limburger).

And, RealBeer offers the interesting suggestion that sweeter bocks could be paired well with “heartier, spicier desserts, such as pumpkin pie or spice cake.” Now, are you thinking what I’m thinking? Considering that we’re in the Thanksgiving season, my family had both pecan and pumpkin pies yesterday; and, we had some leftover as well. So, perhaps around 10pm one evening, I may have to partake in a snack of some pumpkin pie along with St Nikolaus Bock :).

I went to see Bryan’s band (Bulletproof Lincoln) play last night. I got there after they had already started playing, but I still wanted to get a drink at the bar. I walked up to the bar and I glanced around for a line-up of bottled beers but I didn’t see one right away. And since I wanted to get back to the listening area, I figured that I should consider my draught options instead. They had, of course, all the usual Bad American Beers: Coors, Budweiser and so on. But, they also had Killian’s Irish Red.

And, contrary to its name, it’s not from Ireland at all — rather, it’s completely American and made by Coors. I was aware of the Coors connection but I recalled that Killian’s had at least somewhat-dark in color and I thought to myself, “Well, how bad could it be?”. So, ordered one and walked back to listen to the band. I took a few sips and soon discovered that it was not what I was hoping for. [Note to amateur copy editors: “not for what I was hoping”?]

The dark color (well, reddish, anyway) belied its true flavor — or lack thereof. If I was blindfolded, someone could have told me that I was drinking Just Another American Beer and I would have believed him. There wasn’t much flavor at all, other than the distinct wateriness. And there was an odd degree of carbonation — not a creamy effervescence like a good porter but a sharp sparkle more closely resembling a club soda.

A visit to RateBeer.com later that evening confirmed my suspicions. I looked up Killian’s and discovered that it has a score of 2.82/5.0 which puts it in the 28th percentile. To put that in perspective, I checked on RateBeer’s list of Top Accessible Beers. They define an “accessible beer” as those with over 500 ratings — in other words, beers that you'd have a pretty good chance of finding in a store.

And just because a beer is “accessible” doesn’t mean that it’s a bad beer, either. I mean, the top rated Accessible Beer is Ayinger’s Celebrator Doppelbock which is in the 100th percentile (obviously rounded to 100, but still). And even the 17th best Accessible Beer, Guinness Stout, is in the 77th percentile.

But I suppose that there are relatively few beers with that many ratings since the scores tend to trail off towards the bottom of the list. For instance, Sam’s Adams Boston Lager — an otherwise decent beer — clocks in at the 53rd percentile for the #22 spot. In fairness to Sam Adams, I don’t think it a bad beer at all, but in the spectrum of all beers produced worldwide, I can understand that it might be only slightly above average.

There’re 25 entries in RateBeer’s Top Accessible Beers list and Killian’s Irish Red squeaks in at the end. A few of the posted comments mirror my own feelings of this brew:

• “Damn you rate beer, i used to honestly enjoy this, then you came into my life. I can no longer be content in my beer darkness now that you�ve shined your glorious light down upon my palate and shown me what beer can be. Pours a light ruby red with a thin clingy head. dead nose, smells blank. has a bitter tree bark flavor. overly bitter and got bad quick. […] ”

• “This is what I would consider a middle of the road beer in everyway. The color a very nice red, but it cant hide its mass produced roots. […] ”

• “Clear amber colour, the head quickly disappears, butter and grapefruit aroma, some malts, tart and sweet with a bubblegum-like finish — artificial and very forgettable.”

• “Finish is lightly sweet, moderately bitter, slightly metallic. Light to medium body, watery texture, fizzy carbonation. I am amused by the fact that the label says "Manufactured", rather than brewed. […] ”

That’s not to say that I didn’t enjoy the band, but the Killian’s was a bit lacking. After a few subsequent sips I realized that the mildly non-badness of the beer wasn't outweighing the calories that came with it. So, after making it halfway through the glass, I just set it aside.

I stopped by Super Target on the way home from the gym last night and, by the time I got back to the apartment, it was almost 10pm. I didn’t feel like making dinner at that point, so I asked Mike whether he had already eaten dinner (he hadn’t) and suggested that we head off to Quizno’s (there’s one less than a mile from here). My recollection was that Quizno’s closed at 10:30, so it looked like we had enough time.

But, we got there and quickly realized that their closing time was actually 10:00 (doh!). But, Humperdinks was just across the street, so we decided to give that a try (out of curiosity, what other restaurants are open past 10pm in the Lovers & Greenville area?).

Humperdinks has its own brewery and we both wanted to make use of that. Their “Total Disorder Porter” caught my eye and we both ordered one. It was also the special of the day, which was a pleasant surprise. While it wasn’t quite at the level of a Fuller’s Porter, it still very well done (and if it were sold in stores, I’d probably buy it from time to time).

Both Mike and I had a hard time deciding on the menu, but I settled on a Border Burger (a 1/2 pound burger with guacamole, bacon, Pepperjack cheese, jalapeños and salsa) while Mike went for a Ranch Chicken sandwich (a chicken sandiwch with Monterey Jack, ranch dressing, bacon strips, lettuce and tomato).

I noticed on the menu that the Humperdinks Melt was actually served on rye bread (along with Swiss cheese). And considering how ordinary most buns are, I got to thinking that perhaps the Border Burger might be even better on rye. And even though I’ve had a Border Burger previously, I wasn’t sure about those “spicy jalapeños”. So, when I ordered the burger, I asked whether I could get it on rye (and without jalapeños). The server didn’t seem to mind that substitution.

Once the food arrived, I was pleased that the rye bread was thickly cut (about half an inch) and toasted as well. Border Burgers are already tasty, but the rye bread just made it even better. The slight tartness of the rye along with the salsa and guacamole was a great combination.

It helped that the beer was the day’s special ($3.50 for 20oz or so), but the burger was still $9. It was delicious, but I’m still not sure if it was worth $9 (maybe $7-8 would have been more fair). So, once again, rye saves the day. Now if only they’d make a rye pizza :).

This month’s DFWBlogs Cocktail Event was at Old Monk. With such a name, I wasn’t sure what to expect, but I became quickly intrigued as I read the GuideLive review:

The menu has only 16 items, which range from traditional pub grub such as German sausages ($7.50) and fish and chips ($7.50) to the national dish of Belgium, moules frites (mussels and french fries, $8.95). The mussels and fries are as good, or better, than versions I have eaten in France. […]

German sausages? Well, say no more! That made my entree choice very easy :). The GuideLive review also mentioned their Belgian and German beers, so I went to see whether I could find their beer list. Normally, I'd check their webpage, but a search on Google for “old monk dallas” turned up nothing.

However, I did find this Old Monk section on BeerAdvocate (Beer Advocate is apparently a user-contributed site of restaurant reviews with a focus on beer). And I was pleased to see that some of the reviewers mentioned some of Old Monk’s beers.

So, it wasn’t a complete beer list, but it was a start. As usual, I cross-referenced those beers with the ratings at RateBeer.com — the numbers below include each beer’s score (out of five) and its percentile-ranking.

• Chimay - Bleu is 4.16 / 99.3% (!), Red is 3.89 / 95.4%
• Duvel - 3.88 / 95%
• Corsendonk - 3.82 / 93.4%
• Liefmans - 3.77 / 90.9%
• Hoegaarden - 3.7 / 87.6%

There were more beers than just those beers listed at the Beer Advocate page, but I didn’t include beers that I couldn’t find at RateBeer nor those that didn’t score well. And, since some of the beer descriptions on Beer Advocate were vague, I wasn’t sure about some of the specific brews (Chimay has serveral, for instance, though only “Chimay” was mentioned).

Once I arrived at Old Monk, I ordered the German Plate and I was about to order a Chimay Bleu, but I then noticed that they didn’t actually have that Chimay variety (though they had Chimay Red, Chimay Grand Reserve and Chimay White). (I just now discovered that Chimay Grand Reserve is an alias for Chimay Bleu — oops.) However, I quickly noticed that they had Fuller’s Porter — a beer I hadn’t seen previously mentioned in any of the Old Monk reviews.

I needed no encouragement in ordering the Fuller’s Porter — I’m not only a fan of porters but the Fuller is also the top rated porter at RateBeer.com! The 16oz bottle didn’t hurt, either.

The porter soon arrived, along with the sausages. The sausages were of two varieties, though I can’t recall their names at the moment (one was pinkish while the other was more whitish). They included some mustard on the side which went perfectly with the sausages — full of flavor and spice but not too hot.

The porter itself was fantastic and I’m not surprised by its high ratings. It had almost a coffee-like taste but without coffee’s bitter aftertaste (as my roommate Mike put it). I don’t even like coffee but I still found this to be a delicious beer. This is easily my favorite porter and possibly my second-favorite beer (Ayinger Celebrator Doppelbock is still first).

After the Fuller’s, I gave some thought to my second beer. Before arriving, I was all set on ordering a Chimay Bleu. But, of course, that was seemingly the one Chimary variety that Old Monk didn’t have. So, I went for a Chimay Red (“only” in the 95.4th percentile). The Red was a good beer, to be sure, though I’m not sure it lived up to its high expectations. It had more carbonation than I expected and a slight sweetness (which isn’t a bad thing, but just not what I was in the mood for at the time).

I really enjoyed Old Monk and on the drive home I was trying to think whether there were any Cocktail Events that I had enjoyed more. Up to that point, The Meridian Room was probably my favorite (their service, in particular, was exceptional). But after thinking it over, I don’t know if there’s anywhere other than Old Monk where I could get some tasty sausages along with such a good selection of beers in Dallas.

(And, Old Monk apparently has a website after all, though all I see is a broken puzzle piece <g>)

The DFWBlogs Cocktail Event was held at The Meridian Room this month. And, though The Meridian Room’s source code is slightly atrocious (generated by Dreamweaver), I like their site design — the photographs scattered throughout are better than I would expect for this type of site.

Of course, their full menu and drinks list are online. Earlier in the day, I selected the Bleu Cheese Burger along with Spaten Franziskener (on draught!). Unfortunately, upon arriving, I realized that their website was out of date since I couldn’t find the Spaten on the paper menu. So, I ordered my burger and went with a Newcastle instead.

The burger arrived shortly, along with a heaping portion of fries. All of it was steaming and very hot (a good sign, for sure). I added a dab of ketchup to the burger (as usual) but, after tasting the fries, decided that they only needed a dash of salt & pepper.

The burger itself was above par and very good. It’s likely among the top five burgers I’ve had here in Dallas. The blue cheese wasn’t just sprinked on top, but melted — so, it must have been added while still on the grill. Melted or otherwise, they probably could have fit more blue cheese on there. I would have preferred just a touch more (that is to say, as much blue cheese could be crammed on there).

The only letdown with the burger was the bun. The menu listed it as a honey-wheat bun and I could taste the honey and the wheat (no surprise there). But, the bun was not only a bit tall — the top bun may have even been a little taller than the 1/2 lb patty — but the honey flavor was too intense such that the bun resembled a distant cousin of a Cinnabon. The bun wasn’t super-sweet, but it was more sweet than it should have been.

The shoestring fries — presented in a heaping pile next to the burger — were great. Too often, other restaurants overcook their fries into hard sticks; but these were pleasantly pliable. They were steaming and still moist with oil, so they absorbed the salt & pepper easily. Fries don’t get much better than this, and they were probably the best fries I’ve had in Dallas.

The service at The Meridian Room was also very good. Not a moment after finishing a glass, a server appeared and asked whether I would like another beverage. With such attentive service, I had three beers there (I more often go through two beers at other Cocktail Events). Rest assused, I tipped them well for such service.

From when I first saw their quaint website, I had a good feeling about The Meridian Room. And, it didn’t let me down. I had a good time, and I would look forward to going there again.

I enjoyed hanging out with some of Bryan’s New Jersey chums at The Flying Saucer in Arlington on Saturday. The Flying Saucer is well known for having almost 100 beers on tap (and another 100 available by the bottle), so I really looked forward to trying some of them.

Since they have their entire menu online, I spent some time on Saturday afternoon and cross-referenced their beer list against RateBeer.com’s Top Accessible Beers list — it’s a list of their highest-rated beers with at least 300 ratings (that way, you generally have half a chance of being able to find them).

I realized that there was also the chance that some of The Flying Saucer’s beers may have been highly rated but not by as many reviewers. So, I also checked on every other beer on their menu (which didn’t take as long as you might think, since you can search by brand at RateBeer and it’ll show the ratings for all beers under that brand).

I put all this info in my Palm and headed off. Once there, I ordered a Schneider Aventinus to start. It’s in the 98.3 percentile of beers at RateBeer, but also with 8% alcohol. It was strong, but almost had a creamy texture. It was the type of beer that would go well with food (I had a sandwich, in this case).

I hadn’t eaten dinner beforehand, so I looked over their food menu and ordered a Space Club. It’s described as having “ham, turkey, bacon & tomato with cheddar and jack cheese”. Its description made it seem like a club sandwich, but it was no club sandwich. A classic club sandwich generally includes thin toasted bread cut into triangles but the Space Club’s bread was actually a bulky white roll.

And, the sandwich may have been “oven baked”, but that only made it a bit crispy around the edges. The menu mentioned both ham and turkey, but I only detected ham (and no bacon, either). It was like a ham & cheese sandwich on a crispy white roll.

So, the sandwich was a bit of a disappointment, but the beer was still enticing. And, after the Schneider Aventinus, I had an Arrogant Bastard Ale. This “only” had 7.2% alcohol, but it’s in RateBeer’s 97.8 percentile. The label describes the brewer’s philiosophy well:

This is an aggressive beer. You probably won’t like it. It is quite doubtful that you have the taste or sophistication to appreciate an ale of this quality and depth.

One reviewer described it as a “hops bomb” and that’s about right — this beer was chocked-full of hoppy flavor and probably not particularly suitable as a sipping-on-the-beach beer ;).

No subtle use of hops to be found here. Very sharp hoppy aroma (grapefruit/pine), with some raisins. The flavour is pretty full on, hops everywhere, quite bitter and very sharp and a bit sickly, particularly as you work your way through it, the amount of hops throws the balance out a bit. Pretty much everything i was expecting, a massive hop bomb. Did i mention it was hoppy?

I had finished my sandwich by this point, and my intake of the Arrogant Bastard was self-governing. The beer was tasty, but my palette could only take so much at a time. Really, the Arrogant Bastard would have worked better along with food (perhaps a hamburger or… hawaiian pizza?).

I had a good time at The Flying Saucer, and I’d go again. If nothing else, this is one bar where I could order different beers every time — for nearly eternity ;).

The DFWBlogs Cocktail Event was held this evening at The Cavern down on Lower Greenville. Their namesake is apt — it’s just like a dungeon cavern in there.

It was dark, but pleasantly so. They had scattered accent-lighting made up of colored (but shade-less) light bulbs. I saw their intention, but they ended up being a bit bright at times (in the same way that car headlights in your eyes can be bright without illuminating the general area). It would have made a great level for Doom (really).

Interestingly enough, they had no beers on tap (just by-the-bottle). Of the dozen-or-so beers on display behind the bar, I recognized many of them and it was a bit hard to decide. I knew I couldn’t go wrong with Newcastle, but Boddingtons also caught my eye. I recalled seeing it on RateBeer.com’s Top Accessible Beers list (and a quick tap-tap to the mirrored version in my Palm confirmed that it was on the list).

For a moment, I was leaning towards ordering the Boddingtons, but I hesitated and went with the Newcastle instead. When trying new beers, especially ones that might be more expensive than average, I prefer to buy some at a store for drinking at home — that way, I get much better value (even an $8 six-pack is still better value than paying $4/each for two beers).

On Thursday, we celebrated Never Day at Ben’s Half Yard House (GuideLive review). Bryan organized it, but it was Lyn’s choice (and a great choice it was).

I hadn’t previously thought of Ben’s as a “birthday venue”, but it couldn’t have been better. As always, Ben’s was reasonably lit (not a dark cave like some bars and restaurants) and the music wasn’t so loud as to impede conversation.

The service, too, was better than I would have expected — our server cheerfully arranged for separate checks for each of the dozen-or-so people in our party.

Ben’s has an impressive bar (42 beers on tap!), but the food stood out as well. I’m not normally a fan of cheeseburgers (American cheese? bleh), but I ordered one of their cheeseburgers once I realized that they were available with blue cheese.

Some restaurants sprinkle on the blue cheese, but this burger had a gooey hunk of blue cheese paste that engulfed the top of the patty (and I mean “paste” in a good way). The burger was fairly hot with pleasantly crumbly beef. And, the blue cheese worked so well — they really didn’t skimp on the blue cheese, and its flavor shone through. The bun was above average, though still just a white-flour bun (I keep wondering when rye buns will catch on, HHOS).

Along with the burger, I ordered one of their signature half yards, with Fullers ESB. I was originally going for Fullers Porter (as it’s currently rated #4 among reasonably available beers), but they had run out of that. Still, the ESB was dark and very delicious.

I had good conversation, and a great time. Ben’s is quickly becoming one of my favorite bar-restaurants in the area.