Vanilla and Mint: Two Cromulent Tastes That Taste Bad Together

I brush my teeth — but who doesn’t? Anyhow, on a recent trip to Target, I picked up the Refreshing Vanilla Mint flavor of Crest’s Whitening Expressions line. I had previously tried their orange-flavored toothpaste — titled something like Citrus Blast or something equally ridiculous — and it was a pleasant change from the usual mint flavor that toothpastes generally have. Granted, it wasn't exactly like biting into an orange, or even like biting into a piece of orange-flavored Bubblicious, but it made tooth brushing just a tad more palatable.

Getting back to this other flavor, though, I recently noticed that I was running low on my Citrus Whatever tube and so I picked up “Refreshing Vanilla Mint” to give myself some variety. And, it all just went downhill from there…

The canonical vanilla-flavored food item may be vanilla ice cream (with perhaps vanilla yogurt near the top of the list as well). Well, rest assured, this toothpaste resembled neither of those. There was a hint of vanillaness, to be sure, though it somewhat reminded me of the harsh vanilla-like flavor that you might find in a vanilla-themed hard candies.

As for the mint, well, it was there. What can I say — it was pretty much standard-issue toothpaste-mint. Lowest-bidder, factory-borne mint. That alone is perhaps tolerable on the scale of a few minutes here-and-there, such as when brushing one’s teeth; when fused with factory-vanilla, though, the combination is disastrous. Imagine Crest toothpaste in your vanilla latte. Yeah, kinda like that. (Not that Mermaid Coffee uses cheap vanilla, but the end result would be approximately the same.)

In all, I might otherwise recommend the Citrus Whatever flavor of Crest’s Whitening Expressions line. However, after looking over their site, I don’t see it listed any more and I can’t help but wonder if maybe they discontinued it. All the same, since only one of their flavors turned out to be freakishly bad, the others could conceivably be fine. (And, if you can find their Citrus*.* on store shelves, grab it while you can.)

9 thoughts on “Vanilla and Mint: Two Cromulent Tastes That Taste Bad Together

  1. I just finished off a tube of the citrus flavor, and when I went to the store to get a replacement, I couldn’t find it. Sad to hear it may have gone to the Great Bathroom Counter In The Sky. That was good toothpaste.

  2. I am just finshing a tube of the cinammon (blast??) from that same line, and I have nothing good to say about it. Doesn’t taste that good, and also stains your lips red for a short time. I had several people, who saw me upon finishing brushing my teeth, asking me why my lips were so red.

    Anyway, stay away from the cinammon.

  3. I’ll second the Tom’s recommendation.

    When it first came out, Aquafresh Extreme Clean was orange-flavored. According to their website, the Original Extreme Clean is now lemon lime-flavored.

  4. Aquafresh Extreme Clean is, hands down, my favorite toothpaste. Runner up would be Empowermint by the same manufacturer. Ah, subtle word play, thy name is Aquafresh.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.